Maturity you might say. But I would prefer to describe as just me wanting to change. I have changed. For the better I might say. Its just a matter of setting your priorities and knowing how to manage your time well. Im not sure of how much ive changed but I know the differences.

I have been reading the book Sybil. Charmaine passed the book to me. Its in quite a bad state now as I have been bringing it around to read. Sorry dear but I its really hard to keep a paperback in good condition. The book is about a woman who has 16 personalities. Its not alter-egos anymore. Its not a matter of choice anymore.

After going through internship, mixing around with people, I began to realise my alter-egoes. They have names too but it revolves around my original name, Badron.

The original Badron is a thinker, a heavy one, an obsessive one. It makes him high like a being in a daydream. The perfect daydream. He prefers to be alone as it allows him to make free decisions. In a group, he prefers to just stop and listen. He doesn't feel lonely. He feels warm watching people but sometimes people mistook his silence as arrogance. Funny how people cannot help it but judge a person by how he looks. The deceiving face once again brings the owner down.

Then there is Badron (pronounced as Baa-dron). This is the glamour guy. He dresses up in Prada and Armani and he uses Chanel parfum. He walks with a stylish strut with a sense of dignity. He has confidence and he can get whatever he wants. He is the perfect metro-sexual. His favourite attire involves leather, snakeskin and sunglasses. His fashion is more into the vintage age. Nikon camera sling bag, a polaroid in hand and a taxi cap.

Then there is Bad Ron. This is the party guy. He goes to nightclubs and he drinks Vodka, Tequila, Martini's, you name it. He is the absolute charmer. He is comfortable being himself and everyone is comfortable with him. But he isnt happy. He isnt happy at all.

Lastly there is the guy named, Dron. This one was left behind very long ago. He is the introverted, rejected freak from his secondary school days. I hate him and do not want to see him again. He is left dying somewhere. I hope he dies happy.


Just like Sybil, they are all inter-twined and connected. They all one person but many sides to him. Him? Whose 'him'?


So which one do you love?